Can you control your own happiness?
On the wall behind my desk I have written some inspiring reminders to keep me on track and one of these is “Happiness is a choice I make” and I do believe this to be true (most of the time). Some nay-sayers may accuse me of over-simplifying the whole concept of happiness, but in my experience, this personal mantra gives me a sense of being able to steer my destiny and not play victim to unwanted circumstances.
I think it’s a commonly-held belief that happiness is a multi-faceted state of being that can be influenced by a variety of factors in our lives, both internal and external. And while it may not be entirely within one’s control to be happy every moment of every day, both scientific studies and spiritual beliefs suggest that individuals do in fact play a key role in determining their own happiness levels.
What science says about happiness
The scientific understanding that happiness can be a personal choice is rooted in many psychological and neurological findings. While we shouldn’t ignore the fact that external factors and individual differences can influence happiness, there is a growing body of evidence indicating that people themselves have a significant degree of control over their own happiness.
Let’s now look at a few areas of scientific study and see if they back up my thesis that happiness is a choice you can make…even if it might be hard sometimes!
How neuroplasticity relates to happiness
The brain’s remarkable ability to change and adapt, known as neuroplasticity, underpins the concept that happiness can be a personal choice. Neuroscientific research demonstrates that the brain can reorganise its neural pathways in response to new experiences and learning. This adaptability enables us to actively shape our brain’s response to various stimuli, including those related to happiness. Did you know that even the simple practice of positive thinking can lead to observable changes in the brain?
Neuro-imaging studies have also clearly shown structural and functional changes in the brains of people who practise mindfulness meditation, with increased grey matter density in brain regions related to happiness and emotional regulation, such as the prefrontal cortex and hippocampus. And the good news is that there is no use-by date on our neuroplasticity function, so my favourite mantra ‘you’re never too old to learn something new’ has actually been scientifically proven, so no more excuses!
The power of positive psychology
Positive psychology is a field dedicated to understanding and promoting human well-being and happiness. Scientific research in this domain has identified several simple daily practices that can significantly crank up the dial of your happiness levels. Here’s a few ideas to get you on your way… start consciously practising gratitude every day (and really feel the feeling of gratitude in your heart, don’t just repeat empty phrases ad nauseum!)
When you face a situation that generates negative self-talk, remind yourself to stay focussed on your strengths and what’s working for you right now, not on your shortcomings. Or maybe commit to setting and working towards personal goals, however small, or engaging in random acts of kindness, just because it feels so good! Many studies have shown that people who incorporate some of these strategies into their daily life do report higher levels of happiness and life satisfaction. All really do-able.
Connecting for mutual happiness
Did you know that research has proven conclusively that social connections are a significant predictor of emotional well-being, contentment and even longevity? With very few exceptions, we all have the power to actively cultivate and nurture positive relationships, even if it may seem a challenge in certain circumstances. For instance, I recently moved to near Hereford where I have very few connections, and I am faced with this very challenge. I am starting close to home, getting to know my neighbours who I am finding to be incredibly friendly, welcoming and helpful, it’s a small step in the right direction.
However, forging and maintaining strong social connections is not for the lazy or apathetic, it involves making a conscious effort to connect with people, whether that’s family, friends or new neighbours. With a robust support network, it’s easier to engage in meaningful social activities, to manage stress and negative emotions, and to enjoy increased levels of personal happiness.
Conscious choice in determining happiness
Human beings have the capacity to make conscious choices, and these choices can profoundly impact their well-being and happiness. People do have the power to choose how they react to life’s challenges, whether they dwell on negative events or focus on the positive aspects. The ability to make choices about one’s actions, attitudes, and responses is a fundamental aspect of personal control over happiness and something well within everyone’s grasp (if you’re open to it, that is!).
This inherent capacity to make choices about one’s feelings about, and responses to, life events, is a cornerstone of influencing your own happiness. Even if not immediately, there’s always something to take from every life situation, and you can develop resilience through acceptance of what is, and the conscious reframing of circumstances. This process, with practice will allow you to reduce your stress levels and increase your happiness levels.
Getting happy with CBT
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is an evidence-based therapeutic approach that is rooted in the idea that changing thought patterns and behaviours can lead to improved mental health and happiness. By working with a therapist, you can learn to identify and challenge negative thought patterns, develop more positive and realistic thinking, and ultimately improve your chances of feeling happy in your day-to-day life.
CBT has been a very popular therapeutic approach for many years and numerous studies have demonstrated the efficacy of CBT in improving emotional and psychological well-being. CBT has been found to be effective in treating various mental health conditions, including depression and anxiety, by equipping individuals with practical skills to manage their thoughts and emotions, which in turn can lead you to feel happier within yourself.
How hedonic adaptation impacts happiness
This is something I have had to research because, to be totally honest, I’d never heard of it before! Hedonic adaptation refers to the human tendency to adjust to changes in our circumstances, both positive and negative, and return to a baseline level of happiness. Research on hedonic adaptation suggests that whilst individuals may initially experience a boost in happiness after a positive event (like getting a new job or winning the lottery), that over time, they tend to adapt to and normalise this new level of happiness. This hedonic adaptation can be seen as evidence that our happiness levels are indeed determined by personal choice and perspective in any given circumstances.
Mindfulness and happiness
The practice of mindfulness involves paying attention to the present moment without any commentary or judgement. Studies have shown that mindfulness can lead to greater emotional regulation and reduced reactivity to negative stimuli, which may ultimately help to promote happiness. Mindfulness practices can of course be learned and implemented, which again highlights the role that conscious choice can play in our emotional well-being. There is plentiful evidence to support the theory that people who engage in mindfulness practices experience less symptoms of anxiety and depression and they have greater emotional regulation and personal satisfaction.
Final thoughts on being happy
In conclusion, the scientific evidence supports the idea that happiness can be a personal choice, even if external factors play a role too. Everyone has the capacity to actively shape their own well-being by making certain choices, adopting certain practices, and training their minds to focus on happiness-inducing experiences and thoughts, rather than on the negatives, which we are bombarded with on a daily basis!
Beyond research and science I also think there is a component in the pursuit of happiness that we haven’t touched on today, and that is the influence of spiritual beliefs. But I am going to save that for another day…
